Nobody has ever fully cracked the code of relationships, but if one thing is certain, It’s that they are tricky to handle. All couples fight, but does every fight need to leave a bitter taste? Absolutely not! Tricky or not, love is impossible to understand, and as many relationship books suggest, relationships can certainly be navigated with loads of patience, of course.
Why Relationship Books Are Better?
Why go for books when there’s therapy? Well, apart from reading being a therapeutic activity itself, the best advice that works for all couples can be found in relationship books, not to mention reading a book together is also a bonding activity for couples.
Oftentimes, the source of trouble is not the individual but the things they surround themselves with, especially the content they consume. In the case of couples, consuming highly curated, sometimes even fake, content can create a warped sense of reality.
Hence, what couples need is solid advice to counter internal and external voices, and what could be better than tried and tested formulae, i.e., relationship improvement books?
The Best Relationship Books for Couples
The topic of love/relationships is attractive, and many people have written on it, but you have to weed out the cash grabs from the quality stuff. Fret not, for we have created a list of the best relation books.
Shine Brighter by Fred Dodini
Shine Brighter is a cut above other relationship books simply because it’s written by a licensed therapist and a life educator. Dr. Fred Dodini is an experienced behavioral health specialist who’s also seen the high life of the entertainment industry, thus accumulating a comprehensive understanding of life. He spills all his knowledge in one of the best relationship books ever.
This book unveils the secret behind identifying and dealing with different kinds of people, opening up countless hidden and often blocked opportunities. Shine Brighter will help you navigate relationships like no other.
Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find —And Keep — Love by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller
You may have heard the phrase attachment style floating about in the online space, and for good reason. Attached is considered one of the best relationship books because it’s backed by science, namely, attachment theory. The book explores the theory in-depth and gives detailed insights into the relationship between our childhood experiences with love and how that translates into adulthood relationships.
Attached is also one of the best relation psychology books, for it helps in understanding your and your spouse’s psyche better.
Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for A Lifetime of Love by Dr. Sue
Hold Me Tight consistently comes up on lists of best relationship books for couples because, instead of going around the problem, it focuses on the importance of reigniting the emotional connection with your spouse by having real conversations, conversations that will reveal insights that no third-party, person or tool, can reveal.
Dr. Sue was an acclaimed clinical psychologist and family therapist, and her work in the field of family therapy, especially the development of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) gained her the APA “Family Psychologist of the Year” award in 2016. Although Dr. Sue has written multiple books on relationships and family dynamics, Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations For A Lifetime of Love ranks among the best relationship books.
The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts by Gary Chapman
This #1 bestseller is a quick read with a simple premise: learn how you and your partner give and receive love. Gary Chapman, renowned marriage counselor, draws upon his lifelong experience with couples counseling to create the ultimate guidebook, one that millions of sales speak for.
If you’re into easy-to-digest relationship books, consider The 5 Languages of Love should be on your shelf. It’s light on technicalities and provides practical advice for reigniting lost love. No wonder this book is often touted as one of the best relationship books.
Relationship Goals by Michael Todd
This is another #1 New York Times Bestseller and, of course, a common item on best relationship book lists. Pastor Todd combines wisdom from God’s word and his mega-viral sermon series about dating, marriage, and sex into a comprehensive guide.
Relationship Goals has a unique standing among some of the best relationship books, for it puts God at the center of all advice, be it dating, marriage, or sex. This trendy hashtag for viral book stories is as real as it gets, helping millions with the love predicament.
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman
People often take marriage for granted, but the rising divorce rates around the world spell one thing: successful marriages are constant work in progress, and, to make it last, the work needs to be grounded in principles. If only there was a book in the sea of “best relationship books for couples” that would list and explain such principles.
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is the perfect read. Straightforward and full of actionable exercises, this book will make you regret reading all the “relationship improvement books” fodder.
The All-or-Nothing Marriage: How the Best Marriages Work by Eli J. Finkel
History buffs in failing and healthy marriages rejoice! The All-or-Nothing Marriage is a lesson on marriage history, starting from way back in 1620. Finkel compares marriages from different eras and concludes that the best marriages of today are, arguably, the best of all time.
If you’re planning to tie the knot or know someone who is, this history-laden couples book will prove to be a great gift. Finkel’s unique take on love hacks lands it among the best relationship books for couples.
Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus by John Gray
We couldn’t miss this classic self-help book, even if it’s on the more general side. Men Are from Mars. Women Are from Venus is probably the best guide to understanding the opposite sex. The thing that makes it a classic among a plethora of relationship books is the perspective: the readers get to see life from the perspective of the opposite gender.
What’s the validity of the book? John Gray was a relationship counselor and based this book on his years of counseling experience.
Us: Getting Past You and Me to Build a More Loving Relationship by Terrance Real
This wholesome yet practical book can be summed up in one sentence: there’s no competition; it’s a combined effort. Therapist and marriage counselor Terrance Real explains the poisonous effects of the “you vs me” mentality. There’s a reason your spouse is your “partner” in marriage.
Us is a rational approach to instilling the “us” mentality in an increasingly individualistic world, which makes it one of the best relationship psychology books.
Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence by Esther Perel
No matter how open society becomes, sex will always be a taboo topic for open discussion. But that is not to say it cannot be talked about in books, in healthy contexts. Esther Perel does just that in her book Mating in Captivity, where she discusses why intimacy is the key to a healthy marriage. And how to revive a dead bedroom.
I Hear You: The Surprisingly Simple Skill Behind Extraordinary Relationships by Michael Sorensen
Often, the missing puzzle piece in struggling relationships is a lack of communication. In this simple yet actionable guide, you can learn the art of communication. Sorensen breaks down this powerful skill into bite-size lessons on how to listen and react accordingly. If you’re into more modern relationship books, I Hear You is your best bet.
Eight Dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love by John and Julie Gottman
After his successful first book, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work, Dr Gottman joined hands with his wife and research partner, Dr. Julie Gottman, to address eight difficult topics: trust, conflict, sex, money, family, adventure, spirituality, and dreams. The book is a guide on cracking the code behind these make-or-break issues. If your search for the best relationship psychology book always ends in generic reads, you should give Eight Dates a try.
Wired for Love: How Understanding Your Partner’s Brain and Attachment Style Can Help You Defuse Conflict and Build a Secure Relationship by Stan Tatkin
“If only I could read my partner’s mind,” thinks every person in a relationship. What we need to know is our brains our wired for everything, including love, and Wired for Love breaks down your partner’s love language. The principles presented in the book by clinician and researcher Stan Tatkin are drawn from a wide pool of fields, including neuroscience and attachment theory.
Getting The Love You Want: A Guide for Couples by Harville Hendrix
The main selling point of Getting The Love You Want is the “Imago Relationship Therapy”, developed by the author, Harville Hendrix, himself. The technique draws from multiple disciplines, including cognitive therapy and behavioral sciences. The book uses case studies to explain the three stages of intimate relationships and practical steps to deal with issues of each stage.
Boundaries in Marriage: Understanding the Choices That Make or Break Loving Relationships by Henry Cloud and John Townsend
Boundaries are for every people pleaser who’s unable to let people walk over them. Learn how to establish clear boundaries, when to say yes and no, and how to definitively take control of your life. This doesn’t mean you can’t experience a healthy relationship; rather, it’s a way to protect yourself from being trampled over.
With Boundaries, you are essentially learning to protect your marriage by learning to protect your peace.
Conclusion:
There you go, a comprehensive list of the best books for improving relationships. The most common themes in these and all the other relationship books are underpinning principles, understanding the opposing perspective, and communicating properly. Relationships are tricky, yes, but with the right intent and knowledge, maintaining a thriving relationship isn’t a dream.